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Would My Sexual Problems Go Away if I Had a Fantasy Wife?

June 15, 2009

Every entertainment program and magazine touts the latest Hollywood dream couple.  Reality programs always seem to include a former Playboy bunny, guaranteeing high ratings.  Yet these same programs months later report that these dream couples are cheating on each other. 

What gives?  Don’t these people understand they are together with the most beautiful people on the planet?  Why on earth do they cheat on each other?

You may have thought the same thing:  “If I had a wife like that, I would never cheat! “ or “If I had that girl, my sexual desires would be met all the time and I’d be just fine.” 

We probably have looked at our spouse with that type of comparison.  Here are some thoughts about why beautiful people still cheat on each other:barbie

  1.  They have deep wounds from their past and backgrounds that they need healing from
  2. The have deep, unmet needs inside
  3. They are two imperfect people in relationship with each other
  4. They are selfish at their core.
  5. They relationship is built more on sex and lust than it is relationship and true intimacy
  6. Multiple marriages make failure easier
  7. They are not content, even when we get the prize of the trophy wife or hunky husband
  8. They have busy, independent lives that keep them from each other, and expose them to dangerous situations

Guys are especially bad.  They tend to think that if they just had a gorgeous, nymphomaniac wife, their life would be fine and they wouldn’t be tempted anymore.  But marriage is not about sex with the pretty girl.  It’s about growing deep in relationship.  It’s about serving one another.  It’s about struggling together with each other’s junk.

Don’t fall victim to the lie that the pretty girl is the answer.

Go to prayer and ask God to help you learn to “Rejoice in the wife of your youth.” (Proverbs 5:18)

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