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Secrets: A Book Review

June 29, 2009

Secrets_BookIt takes guts for a person to share his or her story of sexual addiction and recovery.   There are risks.  Risks of being labeled, misunderstood, or gossiped about.  Risk of rejection from family, friends, and co-workers. 

But there are also rewards.  The reward of others receiving hope and encouragement.  The reward of others feeling they are not alone in their struggles.  The reward of one guy deciding to do the hard work of recovery.   Or that one wife, who is ready to leave her husband over his infidelities, gains a new perspective. 

Author Jonathan Daugherty is the founder and director of (Be Broken Ministries) in San Antonio, Texas.  He takes a risk in writing his new book  Secrets: A True Story of Addiction, Infidelity, and Second Chances that pays off. 

Secrets is more than one man’s struggle and recovery from pornography and marital infidelity.  The author analyzes the roots of his own addiction and how his early exposure to sexual stimuli affected him.  The book is written in a very introspective way.  The reader learns, that instead of talking about the traumatic events of his childhood and adolescence, the author learned to hide them and cover them up.  He learned to keep secrets.  

Secrets do not go away by themselves, according to the author.  They fester in the darkness.  They grow bigger, and a person must live a complicated, double life to protect his or her secrets. 

The author is open about his dating, engagement, and marriage.  He shares openly the consequences of keeping secrets in a marriage.  He talks about the fallout from his wife learning the truth, and the painful road to recovery and rebuilding trust in their marriage. 

Secrets is redemptive in its message.  Sexual sin and infidelity are not hopeless situations.  Sexual sins must be taken seriously.  They must be talked about.  The author shares how God came to him at his lowest point and offered grace.  He shares how his counselor, and later his wife were extensions of God’s grace. 

walk_toward_the_lifeLIVING IN THE LIGHT

The core theme of the book is:  Living in the Light.  The author believes that secrets must be brought out into the open.  He believes that sexual sin must be shared.  He believes that childhood exposure to sexual stimuli must be talked about.    The author has an application section called “Living in the Light” after each chapter.  Questions that relate to each chapter are offered to help readers consider their own need for growth. 


A wonderful surprise on the last page of the book is a coupon code for a free audio download of this book.  Readers can go to the publisher’s website to download the mp3 file.  The file can be listened to on the computer, and is compatible with most personal media devices. 

Secrets is an easy read.    Readers will not take long to go through this book.  The author’s story is  captivating, and his experiences reflect the struggles of many people.   Those who struggle with sexual sin will find many parts of the author’s story parallel their own.   The appendix includes a helpful list of books, ministries, and organizations to assist a person or couple dealing with sexual sin.


Secrets will be widely available in July.  Copies are already available through (Be Broken Ministries ).   Retail price for the book is $12.99. 

Secrets was one of the best books I have read in a while.  There’s just something about hearing a person talk candidly and reflectively about his story.  This book goes beyond just a story.  Jonathan has you and me in mind.  Many of the things he talked about in his book mirrored my own life. 

Over the next several days, I will write about lessons I learned from the book.  There are a lot of “Ah, ha!” moments.  I look forward to sharing them with you.


One Comment
  1. June 29, 2009 11:51 am

    I read Jonathan’s book, have had the pleasure and privilege of meeting him, and can tell you that he is the Real deal! His transparency is refreshing and encouraging. He inspires me to be authentic and gave my husband and I hope. My husband just returned from one of his workshops and I can tell he’s changed! I praise God for his ministry and for honoring and giving God, the glory for what has and continues to be accomplished in his life. Secrets are no longer secrets when shared….I am telling as many people I can and encourage you to read it. If you are a wife of someone who struggles with sexual purity issues, I encourage you to read it and to receive the message of hope that Jonathan so eloquently delivers. This book provided Truth and deep healing in my own life and for that I am sincerely grateful. Thanks Jonathan for being Real!

    Blessings to all,

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